At half-time it was 4-0, everything was going swimmingly and Sky Sports were even reporting that we had planned a bid for Charles N'Zogbia. 45 minutes later it was 4-1, Jermaine Beckford was lying on a Gigg Lane treatment table and our bid had been downgraded to 'interest'.
Everton aren't we?
* * *
Jan Mucha kept goal in what may well prove to be his last appearance for Everton, with the Slovakian international said to be interested in a move away from Goodison in search of regular football.
John Heitinga started alongside Sylvain Distin in the heart of defence, with Phil Neville operating at left-back and Seamus Coleman reverting from the right side of midfield to the right full-back position, something that David Moyes has indicated may happen as the Irishman's career progresses.
Fit-again Marouane Fellaini was handed a starting berth alongside Leon Osman in the centre of the midfield, with Mikel Arteta and Magaye Gueye operating the flanks. In attack Jermaine Beckford partnered Yakubu, for whom the game was his first in Everton Blue since his loan spell at Leicester City.
The substitutes bench was warmed by Tim Cahill, Diniyar Bilyaletdinov, Victor Anichebe, Leighton Baines and Phil Jagielka, who - presumably - would have donned the goalkeeping gloves had Jan Mucha picked up an injury (Jags famously once acted as an emergency 'keeper for Sheffield United).
There has been growing discontent amongst Evertonians in recent week due to a Summer bereft of any meaningful transfer activity. God knows what would've happened had we been beaten tonight.
It was a good job then, that the Yak had had a pre-match slap-up meal. He opened the scoring on 17 minutes. Mikel Arteta's corner was headed on by Leon Osman, and then Marouane Fellaini, before the big Nigerian leapt (moved his noggin) inside the six yard box to head Everton in front.
It was the cue for the song book to be dusted down and utilised. The travelling Scousers cleared their throats after a few months without their weekly sing-song, and soon chants of 'Who needs Cantona... when we've got Barry Horne' were heard. Next came 'Sharpy (Graeme Sharp - in the evertonTV commentary box) give us a wave' and one that hasn't been heard for a while - 'Feed the Yak and he will score'.
The mood was heightened when Magaye Gueye made it two shortly afterwards - capitalising on a mistake by a Bury defender and slotting home at the second attempt.
Leon Osman - probably the pick of the Everton bunch - added the third. Build up play from Arteta and Neville on the left saw the diminutive midfielder receive the ball on the edge of the box. Some brilliant footwork saw him escape a defender, he took one further touch and curled the ball home seamlessly.
Maggie Gueye - sporting a quite frankly awful mohawk - added a fourth before the break, driving the ball through Steven Schumacher's legs and into the net. Party time!
David Moyes rang the changes at the break, introducing Bilyaletdinov, Anichebe, Baines and Jagielka in place of Fellaini, Heitinga, Arteta and Distin. Diniyar Bilyaletdinov was especially impressive in a central midfield role, playing a couple of 'worldy' passes.
Jermaine Beckford pulled up with a hamstring problem soon into the second half and Everton, quite sensibly deciding not to risk him, played out the rest of the game without a full compliment of players on the pitch.
Bury managed to pull a goal back through a free-kick from ex-Everton youth player Steven Schumacher. The Bury skipper's free-kick took a slight deflection, although Jan Mucha - in full camouflage - should have done better.
4-1 it ended and it proved a good night for Everton, who will be glad to get back to on-pitch matters rather than off-pitch ones. The injury to Beckford was a sour note but hopefully it doesn't prove too serious, and there was even time for the annual Bury pitch invasion, with Jagielka and Yakubu (unsurprisingly) the slowest off the field and therefore the ones that got mobbed.
I believe that's what they call a good night's work.
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